Now that I'm thoroughly absorbed my role of Mom, I'm finding less time for, well, just about everything I used to do pre-motherhood, (except maybe laundry). All the blog-worthy material has just had to simmer on the back burner. Seeing now that it has been 5 months since our last entry, it is high time for a quick note.
January 23rd, Ed, Audrey, and I loaded into the car and drove a little too fast through a snowstorm to make it to our court date at the Barron County courthouse. We had a brief appointment with the judge, who I found to be seriously intimidating. I had been told how much the judges enjoy adoption hearings, considering the weighty nature of most of the hearings they preside over, so I had expected a little less gravity. It didn't help that I missed the "all rise" when he entered the courtroom. I was busy changing Audrey's diaper in the back.
Wisconsin adoption law requires that an adoption can only be finalized after the child being adopted has resided in the home of the adoptive parents for at least 6 months. Up until the finalization, adoptive parents are licensed as foster care providers for the child. The judge asked us a bunch of questions, making sure we understood the nature of taking on the responsibility of permanent parental rights for Audrey. We managed to answer all the questions correctly without smarting off, so the judge saw fit to approve of Audrey remaining under our parental oversight as a permanent member of our family -- for keeps.
After all the official business was over, the judge did lighten up a bit and made some conversation with Ed about farrier work. Then it was over. Regrettably, I was still too intimidated to ask for a picture with the judge to mark the occasion. So, we gathered our coats and car seat, ambled out of the courtroom with a sigh of relief, and headed to an office to fill out one last stack of papers. We celebrated by going out for breakfast at a local cafe.
This day, I had expected a huge wave of rapturous joy and delight at the clearing of this final hurdle. I expected tears. Instead I just felt quietly glad that we were done with all - well, almost all - of the paperwork and the homework that comes with adoption. I was relieved to have it established once and for all that Audrey is truly and legally our daughter now. We had been on this road for a long time and it was good to come to a happy end. But that court hearing did not really change our daily life together that we had been doing for the past 7 months. It didn't change my love for this sweet baby nor my gratitude to her birth parents. It did change our legal status, which is no small matter. However, I am finding that the heart doesn't always respond on cue to an official stamp on a piece of paper. Instead of predictably arriving at the high points, the delights and joys and tears of parenthood continue to surprise me by showing up on the unmomentous days, when we are just living life together.
Now, a couple of months out, I can look back on January 23, and see that the day does hold a special weight in my heart and mind. Because of that day, we can say with triumph -- Bless the Lord, oh my soul, and forget not all his benefits. Audrey's adoption is final!
